veritas

I get worried a lot. I worry about different things, but there is always at least something. I think I'm just scared I'm not going to get what I want out of life. It's so hard to tell where to go and what to do and what's worthwhile and what's not. I guess that's just life. You don't know what's going to happen. I'm just scared of the future. Scared of even a year from now.

I hate being so far away from you. I wish I could be with you all the time. Everything is alright when we're together.

I still hate you. I know I shouldn't hate anyone, I should forgive everyone. But sometimes it feels good to hate some people. You irritate me like a fucking piece of food stuck in my teeth and I can't wait for the day that the food comes loose and you disappear forever.

I have a new guilty pleasure. All of my guilty pleasures aren't bands that I'm ashamed to like because they're poppy or mainstream, it's always the bands I've bashed and then gone back and relistened and realized they aren't all that bad.

Oh god what I'd give to feel the slightest bit alive again.